Today, at the Rose Bowl, I was standing behind a very pretty young woman who was wearing a tank top and carrying a cute baby. Her tank top allowed me to see that her entire back and neck and most of one arm had been tattooed. I didn't understand.
That led my mind to wander to what else I don't understand....
I don't understand:
Ketchup on scrambled eggs.
Saying, let alone believing "9/11 was an inside job".
Pants belted around the bottom of your butt.
55 MPH speed limit on the freeway.
Negative political ads - can't you just tell me why I should vote for you without telling me why I shouldn't vote for the other candidate?
Not returning/acknowledging phone or email messages.
Stiletto heels.
Snooki.
Holding a grudge. Life is too short and you just might end up being really, really sorry.
Wanting to look excessively younger.
Gangsta rap (the kind with mysogynistic and cop-killing lyrics).
Twitter.
When people use "LOL" on everything they write. Everything.
Hate journalism.
Hating anyone/any group, but I understand hating liver.
Random violence.
Targeted violence.
Violence.
Why our friends moved to Texas and Georgia.
That day-glow orange sauce they put on 'nachos' at ballparks and theaters.
How putting logos all over something makes it 'designer' and expensive.
Margarine.
Chinese. Literally, I don't speak or understand it.
Not being able to or not wanting to cook, ever.
Not being the best you can be at least 90% of the time. Okay, 80%.
Celebrating another's failure. (Unless it's a USC loss, but hey...)
Making blanket assumptions based on race, religion or any other differentiating factor.
Gloria Allred.
Sashimi.
Why Cameron snores every night, no matter what position he's in.
There are far more things I don't understand, but that's enough for now. Maybe next I'll tell you what I do understand. I wonder which list would be longer?
