Life Really is a Buffett Lyric Part 1

"Changes in latitude, changes in attitude..."
I'll start by saying I am lucky. I am blessed. I am fortunate. I've made [mostly] good choices in life. Let me tell you about last weekend...

Friday Janauary 21st we both worked a full day, we fixed a little dinner and then packed our suitcases. We were heading out to Oz that evening. The flight had looked promising two weeks ago, with 1st or Business Class assured. It had fallen apart this week and we packed for coach, if we got on at all - Cam took his pillow and I threw in a Snuggie, eye shades, ear plugs and some Tylenol PM.

Arriving about 90 minutes before flight we relaxed in the International First Class Lounge. I send lots of customers up there and we got to try the product out and give some feedback to the manager (thanks Shelley and Ruby!). Ruby was working the lounge and told us it looked very bad to get on the flight, that we were not likely to get out tonight. In my head I was going through the schedule to Hawaii the next morning, as we'd packed tropical clothes...

"Still six thousand miles away from where I'd really rather be"
At the gate, 30 minutes before departure, we could see there were 4 seats left on the flight, in coach, and we were #2-3 on the list. Ruby came to tell us the 4 seats would be going out empty, as there were weight restrictions (typical this time of year). 22 years of flying stand-by have taught me you *never* leave the gate until the airplane pushes back.


Good things don't always come to those who wait, but tonight they did. "Larson, party of 2" was called and we were given seats 45J and 33J, middle seats but exit rows at aircraft doors, so about 4 feet of leg room in front of us. The flight is scheduled at 14 hours and 35 minutes. We made it to Sydney in 13 hours and 20 minutes and I slept at least 7 of those hours. No photos were taken, but I'm sure I was the envy of all in coach with my UCLA snuggie, my high-end eye shades and my ear plugs. When I awoke the woman next to me started and said "I thought you were dead!" Why, thank you, I did have a nice sleep! Cam fared almost as well in his seat with his pillow from our bed.

"The weather is here"
Coming out of Customs about 10 minutes after we got off the plane, we looked around for our friend Peter who said he might pick us up if we weren't in too early. As we were in more than an hour early, we didn't see him. A quick stop at the ATM and we turned toward the train into the city. I stopped Cam and said let's take one more look around for Peter and there he was!

Peter and wife Elizabeth had just returned from 2 weeks in Tahiti the day before. He drove us to our hotel, where it was to early to get in. We decided to stop for a coffee while we waited for Elizabeth to get up and stopped in the Park Hyatt. Enjoying a beautiful flat white, the first since I was last in Sydney in November 2009, I looked up to see a familiar man walking in the restaurant. It was Jimmy Buffett.

"I heard I was in town"
Spending so much of my job protecting celebrities from fans and paparazzi and looking like we'd just gotten off a 14 hour flight, I wasn't about to go over. But Peter did!

Peter went over to tell Mr. Buffett that Cameron and I had just flown in to see his concert the next night and that we were going back on Tuesday. That we were seeing Jimmy for the 25th (Cameron) and 35th (me) time. Yes, indeed, we had flown to Sydney for the Jimmy Buffett concert at the Sydney Opera House.

Mr. Buffett was gracious, explained that he was doing an interview and would be over to say hello once he was done. Elizabeth joined us a few minutes later and we sat as long as we could, but left before Mr. Buffett finished his interview. Yes, we are fans. Big fans who have seen him in California, Washington, Illinois, Wisconsin, Colorado and Hawaii. Big fans who just flew halfway around the planet to see him, but we are not stalkers. No, we are not. Nope. Just one little photo with the BlackBerry camera and the satisfaction of knowing we had made the journey and been rewarded with good friends, a flat white and sharing the restaurant with Jimmy.

G'Day from a temporary Sheila

One of the many nice things about visiting Australia is they speak English there. Mostly.

It's actually - at times - a lot like the States. Aside from insisting they drive on the left side of the road, but not being able to make up their mind on which side of the sidewalk they should stroll, they use English words as we do, but have very interesting ways of putting them together. Let me share a few idioms used by my friends during our visit, just so you'll know what I'm talking about when they creep-oh-so-naturally into my conversation that won't sound affected at all. Mate.:


"It's a bit 'how's your father (pronounced 'fatha' of course)" - tacky, aging, lipstick on a pig, bawdy, could also mean casual intercourse taken to an extreme. I can't stop using it (not to the extreme) for all and any situation and it's making Cameron nuts. I say it just to say it. He's now insisting on telling me how his father is every time I say it. That won't stop me. I just think he's being a bit how's your father, myself.

"Daggy" - worse than how's your father, it also means a nerd when shortened to "dag". Like Cam. Well, he keeps asking me "Who's your nerd?", so he's my dag.

"Bee's dick" - a very, very, very, teeny, weeny, itsy-bitsy unit of measurement. "The bloody stinga was a bee's dick away from getting me".

"Stinga" - any of the bajillion jellyfish in Australian waters that can - and will - maim and kill you.

"Damper" - it was on a menu and the most I could figure out, it's a biscuit. Really, do I want to eat something called a "damper"? Sounds like a wet nappy. Or something you put dirty clothes in.

"Nappy" - diaper. Wet or dry.

"Tomato sauce" - ketchup. Well, it's descriptive, but not the way we use the term.

"Marinara" - what they *HORRORS* put on nachos (go for the bean mix). And on spaghetti. See, they are a lot like us. When they eat spaghetti.

"Pissing pick handles" - raining really hard. Sounds like it would hurt, too.

"Pegged up" - hung on a clothes line, as in "do you want your wet swimmers pegged up?"

"Swimmers" - bathing suit

"Bonza" - cool!

"Breaky" - also seen spelled "brekky" - breakfast, typically involving eggs and bacon.

"Flat white" - good coffee! Brewed coffee (or espresso) topped with a warm, creamy milk top. Smooth and velvety and mmmmm.

"kip" - a nap, as in "taking another kip, Katie?"

"buoy" - well, same as in the States only they pronounce it "boy"

"Backpackers" - a whole cult of young 20-something travelers that travel the country having way too much fun, carrying all their goods in a backpack and drinking beer. Drinking age is 18 Down Under. One of the backpacking places we passed had rules posted for those staying there. Among the rules? "No nudity in public". Sounds fun. One of the other rules seemed to be the female backpackers were required to wear shorts that were far smaller than any nappy, that required some type of wax treatment and which were unbuttoned in front. Sounds scary.

So, when you ask me about my trip, I'll tell you that I avoided the backpackers and the stingas and that I pegged up my swimmers when I got out of the water. However, I thought I was going to need a nappy when a car coming at me on the left was just a bee's dick away from giving me a permanent kip. All in all, it wasn't the least bit how's your father or daggy, just totally bonza, mate. No worries.

G'Day

The whole reason I went to work for an airline was to travel. I love to travel. I've loved it since I was a kid. It never gets old.

Tomorrow night we leave for 11 days in Australia. Well, 10 days, as we end up just skipping August 6. Nevermind, we don't need it. We do get to repeat August 16th, though. This is my fourth trip to Australia. One would think that a 15 hour plane ride - in each direction - is not something to look forward to. I can't wait! I'm just so darned excited about it. We might even get 1st Class! I'm watching the clock now. Waiting for it to be 24 hours before departure so I can check in for the flight. I can't wait! I'm bouncing in my seat!

I have almost a full day of sales calls tomorrow, then the flurry of work emails and things to get done before I leave. My brother will pick us up at 8:15 p.m. for our 10:35 p.m. flight.

Oh! It's time to check in!

I think I better pack.